Airheaded Boys: Cocoons or Oblivion?

I've been noticing a common theme in the guys I've been interacting with lately. No matter who it is, they all seem to have the same quality. What is this uniting feature? They don't know what they are doing.
The biggest airhead in my life right now is Michael. I am so confused because I love him and I hate him at the same time. He is such an amazing guy, yet so infuriating because he doesn't know how to date and for some reason always throws a wrench in the operation. He asks me on dates, yet is sometimes painfully awkward, and clearly not ready for a relationship. The first few dates he didn't even walk me to the door. On one he said "Well...I don't think I really have time to walk you to the door." Okay. Today he asked me on our fourth date of the semester. Good job Michael. BUT when he asked me he said "Oh I just couldn't think of who to ask, so I was thinking about going to this concert alone..." BAD job Michael! Either you want to go with me, so you ask me and leave out the internal debate, or you just go alone!
But the airheadedness doesn't stop with Michael, oh no.
Just tonight, my friend in town from BYU-Idaho called me no less than three times. Each time I was left wondering why he called in the first place.
Example phone conversation:
Me: "Hey Mike, what's going on?"
Mike: "Well....I don't know....what are you doing?"
I tell him I'm basically free.
Mike: "Oh, okay... well I don't know what I'm doing."
Me: "Okay....what do you want to do?"
Mike: "I don't know. I'm going to Lehi with my friend and his girlfriend" (and he didn't know what he was doing?)
Me: "Um...okay, do you want me to come or something."
Mike: "Uh....nah I don't know it's okay...it would probably be weird"
Me: "Okay.......well....I'll see you later...."
What was the point of that call? To make me feel bad that I'm not doing anything and tell me it would be weird if I went with him and another couple to Lehi? I don't know. I don't think he does either.
I still honestly don't think Dean (see The One Week Challenge and The One Week Challenge: A Follow-Up. They are quite funny) realizes girls exist yet. If I come over he will be excited to see me, but the second he sees a mountain bike, he practically cries with joy. He is so sweet and well meaning in his calling with me, but when I ask him to do something he will pretend he has no idea what he is doing.
Example, at a meeting with our committee:
Me: "Okay friends, Dean will start our meeting"
Dean: "What? Uh, well we didn't plan this and we have no clue what we're doing...so I don't know..."
Me: "We know what we are doing. We planned this before"
Dean: "Oh, okay well let's pray"
After the prayer, Me: "Okay, Dean has the spiritual thought"
Dean: "Oh I do? I didn't know"
Me: "Dean, you just prepared one, I was there."
Dean: "Oh yeah, well I guess we'll talk about..."
So sad.
But these boys are wonderful men! They can't be COMPLETELY oblivious! So I, with they help of a friend, who had a breakup because of this phenomenon, have developed a theory to grasp this mystifying behavior.
They are in cocoons. When I explained this to another friend she said "Yup. I'm dating a cocoon."
There is clearly only room for one in these cocoons and they are so self conscious they can't even think about girls. I sure hope they emerge as beautiful butterflies. Maybe I'll be unworthy for them then, because they all have hearts of gold. But in the meantime, I really have to wonder. Are they really completely oblivious? Or are they in cocoons? I pray for the latter.